Vicious Briton Removed From Scene Of Violence

So it’s come to this: “Britain’s most vicious swan nicknamed Mr Asbo has been moved to a secret location to protect river users after a series of attacks on rowers and boaters. The bad-tempered male bird has been attacking boats on the River Cam in Cambridge for the last three years but this Spring his behaviour has got worse.River Cam authorities have been granted an emergency licence by Natural England despite it being bredding season amid fears he could cause serious injury.”

Earlier: British Swan Thinks He’s British People