Be Sure To Sit At Your Computer Watching The Live Stream For "Inactivity In America"

We can all agree that outside of America’s two cities where it’s plausible to live without a car, the people of the United States could do with a little physical activity now and then. Americans used to climb stairs and roll pickle barrels and wrassle the neighbors and tar the roof and dig the potatoes and all other kinds of labor that kept the heart healthy and the buttocks muscular, but now something-something cars computers video games taco bars, and just look at us. That’s why some officials decided to have a seminar in Washington about the crisis of inactivity. Can’t make it? Oh that’s all right, you can “catch the live stream” from the comfort of your computer.