'Project X': Why Doesn't Hollywood Get Young People?

You’ve got to really open your heart to the long hard run of cruddy movies that stretches from January to May. If you succeed in opening it far enough, you’ll decide that Project X, the pre-frat frat movie about three high school losers throwing an “epic” (shudder) party, is nearly awesome — as a movie-going experience, at least. You know: low expectations. Oh and this is actually the entire plot so I am kind of spoiling it for you: a kid’s parents go out of town and he throws a really big party. Still, if you see it in the right frame of mind, with the right audience (a packed theater of 20-year-old boys mainlining Coke and nachos), you can laugh your face off. It’s funny! We should all live a little. Let’s get crunk and trash things! Is that not a message we can all get behind?

But what’s really confusing about the movie is how out of touch it is with The Kids Today. For a film that’s supposed to be a generational touchstone, a Revenge of the Nerds for 2012, it’s totally behind the times. The fact that the kids in it keep saying “epic” should be warning enough. Also, that the main character is singing a 2 Live Crew from 1989 in the beginning of the movie? Uh, no. These kids weren’t born yet in 1989?

Especially for a film directed by an Iranian Brit, who’s supposed to have done “hip” commercials and videos, it’s crazy retrograde. I expect the word “faggot” to get tossed around a lot in a film that’s about three straight guys trying to get laid, but in 2012 we never get a shot of, say, the gay dudes from the high school throwing down at the party? (Despite lingering girl-on-girl softcore tributes even!) Kids today, they like to say “faggot” and they like having homos at their party. And then it all takes place in Los Angeles county, but there’s barely a Mexican to be seen? Come on. Also I expect straight guys to talk about “pussy” a lot, but I also expect the girls to beat them down for it. Instead there’s a bunch of Mean Girls chicks strutting around and ripping off their tops in the pool. As if!

And then: the soundtrack features like, Kid Cudi songs from two years ago? A (very good) remix of a Yeah Yeah Yeahs song from summer of 2009? A J-Kwon song from… 2004??? Also the highlight of the party is that they all do ecstasy? LOL, it is not the 90s. That’s not awesome, that’s just tired. Considering the movie totally pays tribute to Australian party animal Corey Delaney, I guess it makes since that this hot Hollywood mess is years behind.

While half this garbage is funny, at least, the youths of our time deserve a sleazy, gross-out party movie that represents them, not this old man baloney. The kids deserve better.