Football Pick Haikus For Week 11

by JIM BEHRLE November 17, 2011

Thursday, November 17

NY Jets -6 At Denver
Thursday Night Football!
So just DVR “Whitney”
and never watch it. PICK: JETS

Sunday, November 20

At Atlanta -6 Tennessee
Atlanta coach blew
their last game in Overtime.
Falcons are grumpy. PICK: FALCONS

At Miami -2 Buffalo
“Don’t Stop Believing”
sang Journey and that also
covers “Bill-lieving.” PICK: BILLS

At Baltimore -7 Cincinnati
Ravens don’t show up
against teams that suck but the
Bengals do not suck. PICK: RAVENS

At Cleveland -1 Jacksonville
Play this game on an
Aircraft Carrier! Losing
Team walks the damned plank. PICK: JAGUARS

Oakland -1 At Minnesota
I’d ask Prince to play
halftime shows at Vikings games.
At least you’d see Prince. PICK: RAIDERS

At Detroit -7 Carolina
Lions gearing up
for their big Thanksgiving game.
Panther apéritif. PICK: LIONS

At Green Bay -14 Tampa Bay
The Bay of Pigs Game!
Packers might want to lose once
to take pressure off. PICK: BUCCANEERS

Dallas -7.5 At Washington
Some people want to fire
Redskins owner Dan Snyder.
Maybe he can QB. PICK: COWBOYS

At San Francisco -9.5 Arizona
It’s Bandwagon Time!
Coach Jim Harbaugh is Gandalf!
Frodo is his QB! PICK: 49ERS

At St. Louis -1.5 Seattle
Starbucks is closing
their public restrooms but you
should still take leaks there. PICK: SEAHAWKS

At Chicago -3.5 San Diego
The Chargers will start
winning now like they always
do in November. PICK: CHARGERS

At NY Giants -4.5 Philadelphia
Cris Collinsworth calls
Michael Vick “Mike Vick” which gives
me aneurysms. PICK: GIANTS

Monday, November 21

At New England -15 Kansas City
Matt Cassel is hurt
so New England won’t get to
thank him for leaving. PICK: CHIEFS

Last week’s Haiku Picks went 6–11. Grim! Season to date is 67–81–3.

Jim Behrle tweets at @behrle for your possible amusement.