Woman Has Close Encounter With Wild Wolves

“By this time I am standing still. The great dog is far enough away yet for comfort, but I am getting ready to assess the situation. Nine thirty on a Saturday morning and there is no one else in sight. In mid-bound, the dog’s head swings up and his eyes lock onto me. Halting on a dime, he stares at me, and I at him. Very close. If he were a car, I could read his license plate. After an interminable five seconds, he turns and trots along at ninety degrees. Then I see the others: first two, then three more. All huge, white-grey, stunning. I finally map their features onto what I know only from David Attenborough films. Wolves.”
 — The Last Word On Nothing’s Jessa Gamble was set upon by a pack of wolves by a frozen lake in Canada recently. She survived because, despite what the Brothers Grimm and Sarah Palin would have you believe, wolves don’t really ever attack humans. These ones just ran up and passed on by. But, man, that must have been exciting! (Note: that is not a video of Gamble’s encounter, above. It was shot a few years ago, in Yellowstone Park, apparently. Also: it is surprisingly difficult to find a video of “wolves running” that is not set to the music of Enya or Nickelback.)