America's Growth Industries: Whoredom, LOLGifs

“In this third year of the Great Recession, it’s starting to set in for a lot of people that the rest of their lives will be, at best, a grim struggle. From early forced retirement for people who have no financial cushion to retire upon to the tens of millions of jobless younger adults still living with mom and (occasionally) dad, for all but the top 5%, it’s just a long hard slog from here on out. That’s why more and more new ‘Internet companies’ are based on the model of the whorehouse: Are you a reasonably attractive poor woman who doesn’t yet look ‘used up’? Then you can rent (with your pre-paid Visa card) a dingy room with a twin mattress and a sink from the virtual madam, and then hopefully entice one of America’s rich men into banging you for a small fee, until he gets bored and moves on and you, inevitably, die poor and alone.”
 — Here’s your choices, pretty much: become a “lady on the side” for a “sugar daddy” or you can found start a website, perhaps a web network of funny cat pictures that gets $30 million in investment. TIMES ARE TOUGH, MAKE YOUR CHOICES WITH CAUTION. (Also there is gonzo porn as an option, which has a low start-up cost and also few barriers to entry. Uh, that’s what she said, I guess.)