2012 London Olympics Mascot Announced: Artist's Rendering!

We already knew that London’s Olympic Stadium would be literally made of knives. Now the London 2012 chairman Sebastian Coe has hinted at the identity of the mascots for these coming Olympics: they will be “made of steel” and they will be “aimed at children.” Oh dear. Let’s take a look at the proposed designs for the stadium and the mascot!

It’s a good start, I guess, but I wish they’d paid a little more tribute paid to glassing, which, as the black sheep of the knife crime family, never really gets its due. A few scattered shards is all I’m asking for.

This is much more promising. Sure, Little Englanders will be upset by its European characteristics, but they’ve hit all the major points, right down to the hoodie-style helmet. They should call him “Mr. Shanky,” just because.

Overall, I’m very impressed. Blades up, Britain, the games will be here before you know it! Just keep dodging those daggers.

RELATED: Guardian readers have some suggestions of their own. Be sure not to miss the crack-smoking squirrel.