Cubenx, "Phase Rotation"
If you stayed off the Internet this weekend you deserve a Nobel Prize in the field of Being a Fucking Genius. What a nightmare the whole goddamn thing has become, right? Now, yes, I realize I have developed something of a reputation for being a bit of a downer, the kind of person who can only see the negative side of life, so I took some time yesterday to delve deeply into my psyche and discover why I’m so frequently discouraged with the way the web has played out. After all, there are tons of people out there to tell you that things are terrific, they’ve never been better, there’s nothing but blue skies ahead. Not all of them can be completely self-delusional or trying to sell you something, can they? Some of them must, in spite of all the evidence to the contrary, believe it to be true. And yet I remain unpersuaded. Is this false nostalgia on my part? The bitterness of a man growing older who pines for the seemingly sunnier days of his youth? No. I wasn’t exactly in love with life back then either. So, after careful consideration, here is what I have concluded: It’s not that things used to be so much better, it’s that everything is getting so much worse. Also, there are fewer places to hide now. You used to have to make an effort to realize just how awful it all is; now they ring your doorbell, shove it straight at you and then put up a picture of you with it smashed all over your face and expect you to like and share it. And you do. Really, it’s all your fault. Anyway, if you have to be on the Internet — and you hate yourself, so you do — at least there’s music. Why, here’s some now! Enjoy.