A Poem by Felix Bernstein

by Mark Bibbins, Editor

If Loving You Is Wrong

If C.S. Giscombe (2,860 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Rob Fitterman (3,620 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Caroline Knox (4,120 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Claudia Keelan (4,280 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Tom Mandel (5,150 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Ed Roberson (6,100 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Marjorie Welish (6,110 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Aaron Shurin (6,180 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Joseph Lease (6,190 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Ray DiPalma (6,490 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Graham Foust (6,800 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Diane Ward (7,600 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet

If Drew Gardner (7,740 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Tony Towle (7,880 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Stephen Ratcliffe (7,980 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Stacy Doris (8,110 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Katie Degentesh (8,260 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Noelle Kocot (8,290 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Laynie Browne (8,390 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Laura Mullen (8,830 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Rusty Morrison (8,840 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Jennifer Moxley (8,940 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Stephen Rodefer (9,130 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Joseph Ceravolo (9,150 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Victor Hernández Cruz (9,380 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Bin Ramke (9,530 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Gustaf Sobin (9,720 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Sharon Mesmer (10,100 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Myung Mi Kim (10,100 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Kenward Elmslie (10,600 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Charles North (10,700 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Maureen Owen (10,900 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Julie Carr (11,000 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If G.C. Waldrep (11,100 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Gary Sullivan (11,300 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Paul Violi (11,300 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Kathleen Fraser (12,100 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Noah Eli Gordon (12,200 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Carla Harryman (12,400 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Joan Retallack (12,900 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Joshua Marie Wilkinson (13,000 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Larry Eigner (13,100 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Elizabeth Willis (13,500 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Hannah Weiner (13,700 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Donald Revell (14,300 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Tan Lin (14,400 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Edwin Torres (14,400 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Mei-mei Berssenbrugge (15,000 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Maxine Chernoff (15,000 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If John Wieners (15,100 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Craig Dworkin (15,400 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Christian Bök (15,700 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Eleni Sikélianòs (15,800 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Ronald Johnson (16,400 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Robert Grenier (16,500 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Miguel Algarín (16,700 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Ann Lauterbach (16,900 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Mark McMorris (17,000 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Jessica Hagedorn (17,400 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If K. Silem Mohammad (17,900 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Keith Waldrop (18,000 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Brian Kim Stefans (18,000 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Catherine Wagner (18,500 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If CA Conrad (18,700 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Nada Gordon (19,000 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Amy Gerstler (19,100 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Gillian Conoley (19,400 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Bill Berkson (19,800 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Michael Davidson (19,900 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Will Alexander (20,000 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Art Lange (20,200 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Wang Ping (20,500 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Russell Edson (20,700 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Susan Wheeler (20,800 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Lorenzo Thomas (20,800 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Vanessa Place (21,600 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Elaine Equi (21,700 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Clarence Major (21,800 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Barrett Watten (21,900 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Ed Dorn (21,800 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Andrew Joron (22,000 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If August Kleinzahler (22,100 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If John Godfrey (22,700 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Cole Swensen (23,400 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Paul Blackburn (23,500 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Jayne Cortez (23,600 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Claudia Rankine (23,800 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Paul Hoover (24,000 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Elizabeth Robinson (24,700 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Norma Cole (24,700 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Bob Perelman (25,300 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Anselm Hollo (25,400 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Lisa Jarnot (25,800 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If David Antin (26,200 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Diane Wakoski (26,500 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Hilda Morley (27,200 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If John Yau (27,300 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Clark Coolidge (27,500 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Linh Dinh (27,700 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Bernadette Mayer (27,900 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Harryette Mullen (28,000 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Jackson Mac Low (28,200 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Wanda Coleman (28,200 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Bruce Andrews (28,300 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If David Shapiro (28,800 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Barbara Guest (28,800) results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Fanny Howe (29,400 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Peter Gizzi (28,900 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Ben Lerner (30,000 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Jimmy Santiago Baca (31,800 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Rosmarie Waldrop (31,900 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If John Giorno (32,500 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If George Evans (32,500 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Laura Moriarty (34,100 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Steve McCaffery (35,500 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Nathaniel Mackey (36,900 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Dennis Cooper (40,100 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If James Schuyler (40,300 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If C.D. Wright (40,300 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Alice Notley (42,300 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Diane di Prima (42,600 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Kenneth Goldsmith (42,600 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Ed Sanders (43,400 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Leslie Scalapino (45,100 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Ron Padgett (45,700 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Clayton Eshleman (46,200 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Robert Kelly (46,500 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Lyn Hejinian (48,800 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Ted Berrigan (50,300 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Eileen Myles (51,200 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Tao Lin (51,300 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Andrei Codrescu (56,200 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Philip Whalen (57,400 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Susan Howe (58,000 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Jorie Graham (58,600 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If James Laughlin (58,100 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Michael McClure (62,300 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Michael Palmer (65,000 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Jim Carroll (65,400 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Jack Spicer (68,400 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Natasha Trethewey (70,800 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Tom Clark (75,300 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Anne Waldman (77,300 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Ron Silliman (78,700 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Kenneth Koch (79,500 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Bill Corbett (82,600 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Jerome Rothenberg (84,000 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Kay Ryan (87,100 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Mark Doty (98,400 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Charles Wright (99,500 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Gregory Corso (101,000 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If David Lehman (112,000 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Charles Olson (116,000 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Robert Duncan (122,000 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Charles Bernstein (129,000 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Robert Pinsky (141,000 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Denise Levertov (143,000 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Robert Creeley (147,000 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Rita Dove (148,000 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Charles Simic (149,000 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If W.S. Merwin (155,000 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Lawrence Ferlinghetti (158,000 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Audre Lorde (166,000 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Robert Hass (169,000 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Gary Snyder (216,000 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Amiri Baraka (224,000 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Rae Armantrout (224,000 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If John Ashbery (243,000 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Mary Oliver (310,000 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Adrienne Rich (323,000 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Anne Sexton (339,000 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Catullus (355,000 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Robert Lowell (363,000 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Frank O’Hara (361,000 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If John Cage (375,000 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Billy Collins (410,000 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Dante Alighieri (417,000) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Jack Kerouac (497,000 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Allen Ginsberg (521,000 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Charles Bukowski (523,000 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If William Wordsworth (526,000 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Sylvia Plath (547,000 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Maya Angelou (722,000 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Walt Whitman (732,000 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Langston Hughes (754,000 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Robert Frost (812,000 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Emily Dickinson (980,000 results) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Homer (4,160,000) is a poet, I don’t want to be a poet
If Socrates (7,700,000 results) is a poet, I’ll consider it
If Andy Warhol (16,300,000 results) is a poet, I want to be a poet

Felix Bernstein is the author of Notes on Post-Conceptual Poetry (Insert Blanc Press) and co-editor with Vanessa Place of the forthcoming anthology Killing It: Cruel Art After the Internet. His videos and writings can be found at felixbernstein.com.