Science Discovers Seven New Planets For Us To Pollute And Destroy

Now we don’t need to make hard choices about the terrible things we’re doing to the Earth!

Just this morning I was worrying about “the ecological predicament of the 21st century” and a change in the climate that “promises a different sort of death from the petty disasters of war, famine, and pestilence — it promises near-total species collapse.” So I cannot tell you how excited I am about this:

Not just one, but seven Earth-size planets that could potentially harbor life have been identified orbiting a tiny star not too far away, offering the first realistic opportunity to search for biological signs of alien life outside of the solar system. The planets orbit a dwarf star named Trappist-1, about 40 light years, or about 235 trillion miles, from Earth. That is quite close, and by happy accident, the orientation of the orbits of the seven planets allows them to be studied in great detail. One or more of the exoplanets — planets around stars other than the sun — in this new system could be at the right temperature to be awash in oceans of water, astronomers said, based on the distance of the planets from the dwarf star.

I just hope we can get out there to start fucking up all these new environments before the damage we’ve done to the shithole we live on now catches up with us. Get off your ass, Elon Musk, the clock’s ticking!

7 Earth-Size Planets Orbit Dwarf Star, NASA and European Astronomers Say