Lurker Doxxed

“The solar system appears to have a new ninth planet. Today, two scientists announced evidence that a body nearly the size of Neptune — but as yet unseen — orbits the sun every 15,000 years. During the solar system’s infancy 4.5 billion years ago, they say, the giant planet was knocked out of the planet-forming region near the sun. Slowed down by gas, the planet settled into a distant elliptical orbit, where it still lurks today.”
 — Also, astronomers at the California Institute of Technology “are calling it Planet Nine (and, for the past year, informally, Planet Phattie — 1990s slang for ‘cool’).” WE DON’T DESERVE ANY NEW PLANETS.