How Your Jizz Is Expressed

“In my mind, it is always ‘coming,’ ‘come,’ or ‘came,’ respectively, because I find the shorthand to be one of the worst slang terms available in the English language. It’s so…truncated. It’s squat. ‘Cum’ is for the men trying to get me to cyber with them on ICQ; it’s the paperbacks I found in the bookcase of a rental apartment my family once lived in. ‘Cum’ is the deliberately misspelled phrase that, to me, fails to denote any kind of sexually satisfying sleaze and instead only conjures up grease, a shortcut to pleasure, and there are no shortcuts to pleasure, or at least there shouldn’t be.”
 — How do you spell that stuff?