Escape Your Sorry-Ass Life By Becoming A TV Writer, Here's How

“TV agents aren’t looking for worker drones, they want to make you rich so they can commission your giant paycheck. They’re hoping that you can create your own syndicated show some day, so don’t hold back. I also hear a lot of ‘then in episode two, XYZ happens.’ There probably won’t be an episode two. Pack all of your good ideas into episode one.”
 — How does an aspiring TV writer get discovered by an agent? Not by sitting around reading the dumbass stuff that idiots put up all over the Internet, that’s for sure. Instead, she should read this advice from a former comedy agent at UTA and WME and then she should stop reading all the dumbass stuff that idiots put up all over the Internet and focus on writing her show. If she’s successful soon enough idiots will be writing dumbass stuff about her on the Internet, which she will never see because she is too smart to read any of the dumbass stuff idiots put up all over the Internet. In fact, maybe we should all just read this advice from a former comedy agent and then turn off the Internet altogether, because apart from this advice the rest of it is just the dumbass fruit of idiot labors and we’re the idiotest of all for partaking of it. Anyway, good luck with your script.