This Week in Lines: Some Things in Life Are Kinda Free

by Jake Gallagher

1:34 PM Wednesday, October 15th — Free donuts for the Dough opening
Location: 14 West 19th Street
Length: A hundred and ninety-two people with inner Homer Simpsons
Weather: 77 and partly cloudy
Crowd: Local office-workers, for whom a free donut is probably the highlight of their week
Mood: Excited enough to make me question whether or not these people need anymore sugar in their systems
Wait time: Fifty minutes
Lingering question: How long can one function at work after consuming a Dulce de Leche donut?

6:47 PM Thursday, October 16 — Zhu Tickets
Location: Opening Ceremony, 35 Howard Street
Length: Eighty-seven people
Weather: 67 and partly cloudy
Crowd: An inexplicable blend of normcore twenty-somethings and aging finance bros
Mood: Smug
Wait time: Over an hour
Lingering question: What does it mean that I don’t know who Zhu is?

2:08 PM Saturday, October 11 — Ticket Line
Location: The Museum of Modern Art
Length: Around the entire lobby and out onto 54th Street
Weather: 59 and cloudy
Crowd: A mix of Matisse fans trying to get an early glimpse at his new show and tourists who come to MoMA because that’s just what you do
Mood: Abstract
Wait time: Thirty-five to forty minutes
Lingering question: How many selfies get taken at MoMA a day?

Jake Gallagher is a writer for A Continuous Lean and other places.