Brooklyn: "WHY IS EVERYBODY MOVING SO SLOWLY?"

“When we emerge on Bedford Avenue, Lyonne seems terrified. ‘You notice how everything just slowed down?’ she asks. ‘Why is everybody moving so slowly?’ We pass a blonde, dreadlocked hippie playing guitar. ‘A handsome young person you could probably sleep with is the Williamsburg equivalent of a homeless guy,’ says Lyonne. ‘Look at this guy. You could totally take this guy home for a hot meal.’ Seconds later, we pass a sofa on the curb. ‘He has sex with women on the sofa in broad daylight, while reading The Tin Drum and strumming his guitar,’ says Lyonne. ‘Welcome to fucking Brooklyn. Does anyone over 50 live here?’”
 — Natasha Lyonne, dream girl.