San Francisco Mission Residents Dumbfounded By Local Predator

A common wild animal that lives throughout the San Francisco Bay Area is leaving local residents scratching their heads in utter amazement. The animal, a coyote, became trapped in a backyard in the popular Mission District. Who has a backyard in the Mission? Mark Zuckerberg? Let’s say “Mark Zuckerberg.” He trapped a coyote in his immense backyard behind his mansion, which violates your privacy.

“Mission District Coyote is telling no tales,” reports the local CBS website. What did Mark Zuckerberg do to this coyote, so that it cannot tell tales? What is a wild member of the canine family if not a beloved storyteller? “A wayward coyote trapped in a backyard at 18th and Capp is offering investigators few clues on how it ended up in the middle of the densely-populated Mission District.”

Was the treasure map not a clue? What about the plaid cape and matching cap? Was that not a clue?

The animal is being rehabilitated and should be back to work (as a tech shuttle driver) shortly, investigators said.

Photo by John Picken.