Football Pick Haikus For Week 9

Football Pick Haikus For Week 9

Thursday, November 1

At San Diego -7.5 Kansas City

I’m hoping Chiefs’ star
cornerback Brandon Flowers
gets six pick sixes PICK: CHIEFS

Sunday, November 4

Denver -3.5 At Cincinnati

The Bengals will play
great and then Peyton Manning
will steal their candy. PICK: BRONCOS

At Green Bay -11 Arizona

I’m sick of losing cash
betting against the Green Bay
Packers every week. PICK: PACKERS

Miami -2.5 At Indianapolis

Why do I like the
Colts this year? Everyone loves
an Indydog, right? PICK: COLTS

Baltimore -3.5 At Cleveland

I keep picking “Browns.”
Sadomasochism is
what I’m all about. PICK: BROWNS

At Houston -10 Buffalo

If you gave me ten
points I’d pick my mom and dad
over all the Bills. PICK: BILLS

At Washington -3 Carolina

When hype meets hype the
winner is ESPN
and the booyah guy. PICK: REDSKINS

Detroit -4 At Jacksonville

Lions played great at
home but can they win in an
empty stadium? PICK: LIONS

Chicago -3.5 At Tennessee

The Bears seem destined
for great things and the Titans’
uniforms are crap PICK: BEARS

At Seattle -5 Minnesota

Seahawks love to play
at home because other teams
play so far away. PICK: SEAHAWKS

At Oakland -1.5 Tampa Bay

Pirate mascots
Battle for supremacy
and the wooden leg. PICK: RAIDERS

At NY Giants -3 Pittsburgh

It would be nice to
give the state of New Jersey
something fun to watch. PICK: GIANTS

At Atlanta -4 Dallas

I just get the strange
feeling that Dez Bryant will
get his hand in bounds. PICK: COWBOYS

Monday, November 5

At New Orleans -3.5 Philadelphia

The Eagles couldn’t
beat the cheese whiz out of a
Tony Luke’s cheesesteak. PICK: SAINTS

Last week’s Haiku Picks went 4–10. That’s 50–66–3 for the season. Monkeys do better writing haikus with their feces. We need to go 16–0 to even it up. Sadly, there aren’t 16 games this week.

Jim Behrle tweets at @behrle for your possible amusement.