Ketan Vora, Internet Superstar

by Leandro Oliva

There are things in this world that need to be nurtured, cared for, and protected. Floating crates of mewing kittens, hatchling turtles disoriented by artificial lighting, baby seagulls ensnared by fishing nets. Likewise, we must nurture and care for Ketan Vora, the internet’s newest multinational rising star. Ketan is quickly gaining a following on Tumblr for his disarmingly friendly interactions, and his straightforward style of gifting tagged images of flower bouquets and sweets to his female (and, sometimes, male) fans.

Take, for example, this recent Facebook chat Ketan conducted with Lola Gupta.

Little is known about Ketan Vora at this point. We know that he currently resides in India, and is evidently “a dancer.” His posted telephone number appears to be serviced by an Indian wireless company. He is also a dedicated fan of such things as Dell personal computers…

horses…

… and deserts.

Would you like to interact with Ketan? That may indeed be one of the best decisions of your inane life. Be mindful, however, that Ketan is a highly sensitive individual.

Also, be mindful that this may all be some highly sophisticated viral campaign, because earnestness this pure seems all too good to be true. So gather, all ye rabid, feckless masses roving for cheap thrills. Let us elevate Ketan to the highest altar of viral fandom, beyond the clutches of ill-intentioned tweens.

Leandro Oliva is a carbon-based freelance writer. He can be reached here.