How Many Crickets Can't You Hear?

“Since ‘Gucci Gucci’ landed on the Internet this summer, Kreayshawn’s face, her song and her name — that name! Ooh, I want to crush that name flat between two good, old, important books — have been everywhere, including at the MTV Video Music Awards, where she was nominated as best new artist; on the cover of Complex magazine; and on the payroll of Sony Records, where she signed a deal for an album due out early 2012. (For a million dollars! A figure no one will confirm!) She was even recently on NPR. ‘The rapper describes L.A. as overly materialistic,’ reads NPR’s adorably NPR-ish online description of its interview, ‘where dress and possessions divide people.’”
 — Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God. (“The Internet is basically like being at a house party and trying to find the bathroom and opening up a door to a room where a bunch of kids are playing a game or doing a drug or having an orgy (metaphorically) or something and you get all flustered and say, ‘Oh, my God, I’m sorry!’ and they all look at you like, ‘You pervert,’ and you quickly slam the door shut.”)