Lady We All Kind Of Forgot About Decides Not To Do Job She Didn't Have A Chance At

Sarah Palin will not run for president of the United States. In related news, I have decided that I am going to let someone else be God for a little while longer. Even though it’s fairly obvious that I’m the best person for the position, this website comes first, and I feel like I can do more for humanity by posting bear videos and writing “Sure, why the hell not” about ridiculous news stories than I could as the omniscient Lord Over Creation. I will continue driving the discussion for bourbon and blowjobs from this platform here, confident that I can do just as much for those issues with your support as I could by being King of the Heavens. Know that by working together we can bring this world back — and as I’ve always said, one doesn’t need a title to help do it. Even if I could have totally gotten it. Would have been easy! God bless you, and God bless me, who could have been God. Thanks!