Football Pick Haikus For Week 2

by JIM BEHRLE September 15, 2011

Sunday, September 18

At New Orleans -6.5 Chicago
Week One the Saints played
Like a “Treme” episode.
They almost got good. PICK: SAINTS

At Detroit -8 Kansas City
The Chiefs crushed at home
by the Bills. That’s like Ron Paul
beating up Tyson. PICK: LIONS

At NY Jets -9 Jacksonville
Jags QB McCown
is a giant McUnknown.
Don’t throw near Revis! PICK: JETS

At Buffalo -3 Oakland
The Bills quarterback
Was smart enough for Harvard.
Raiders attend jail. PICK: BILLS

At Washington -3.5 Arizona
Redskins were not bad
Week one. Too bad their nickname
is pretty racist. PICK: CARDINALS

Baltimore -6 At Tennessee
Ravens beat Steelers
In a blowout, which is tough
even on Madden. PICK: RAVENS

At Pittsburgh -14 Seattle
Seven turnovers
In Game One. Steelers need some
really crazy glue. PICK: SEAHAWKS

Green Bay -10 At Carolina
Packers look awesome.
But my fantasy team is
starting Cam Newton. PICK: PACKERS

At Minnesota -3 Tampa Bay
I wouldn’t watch this
game if you paid me McNabb’s
whole big salary. PICK: VIKINGS

Cleveland -2.5 At Indianapolis
Without Peyton M.
The Colts look like Rocky right
before the montage. PICK: COLTS

Dallas -3 At San Francisco
This used to be a
great match-up, but the ’90s are
over and Pearl Jam sucks. PICK: 49ERS

Houston -3 At Miami
Dolphins let the guy
in the Uggs commercial throw
for 500 yards. PICK: TEXANS

At New England -7 San Diego
When the Chargers come
to Foxboro they might get
turned into chowder. PICK: PATRIOTS

At Denver -3.5 Cincinnati
Either play Tebow
at QB or he might float
right into heaven. PICK: BENGALS

Philadelphia -2.5 At Atlanta
Battle of the birds!
In the dome, on the turf they
might both score 50. PICK: EAGLES

Monday, September 19

At NY Giants -6 St. Louis
The only good thing
Manning might do this year
is car commercials. PICK: RAMS

Last week’s Football Haiku Picks went 6–9–1.

Jim Behrle tweets at @behrle for your possible amusement.