Here's Why You Need A Roku Box
Do you want to be your best self? Sure you do. Here’s how to start. Buy a Roku Box. Wait, what? Your life plan for being the best you can be didn’t involve a small $100 box that would allow you to watch Netflix Watch Instantly and all sorts of other online streaming television AND media files from a portable hard drive via USB directly on your TV? Well, that’s why you’re letting us — me, your parents, everybody — all down with what you’ve done with yourself thus far.
It’s fine. You’re behind the curve. You were under the impression that nerds who could setup a modded out XBox (cool job nerds) were the only ones who could watch the best in streaming online video content and not not-pirated and illegally downloaded media. I’ll be honest, that’s what we’d suspected you’d think. You haven’t so much let us down as continued to meet our managed (read “lowered”) expectations of you.
But enough about you failing the people who care about you most in life, here’s what’s great about the Roku Box: You just get it, plug it into your TV, connect it to your Wi-Fi, and then you’re ready to go. Everything on Netflix Watch Instantly is right there! Boom! Hulu Plus! Boom! Let’s kick it up another notch: Plug a portable hard drive into the USB port and, just like that, you can watch all of the episodes of the Korean soap opera “Secret Garden” that you downloaded off the really cool Korean soap opera messageboard just a few days prior! BOOM! It’s really that easy.
So stop trying so hard to be someone you’re not by “going out” and enjoying an “active social life.” You’re just disappointing everyone! Stay at home, watch Korean soap operas on your Roku Box, cool guy.
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