Alligators Should Have Their Own Week On the Discovery Channel

“On the rare chance you do find yourself or a loved one clenched in the teeth of a crocodilian, experts say fight with all your might. ‘Smack them and punch them in the nose, eyes, and head, and fight them with everything you have,’ said Todd Hardwick, owner of the Pesky Critters trapping program. ‘Most of the time they’ll let go and move off.’ And remember, experts say, crocs and alligators are just trying to do their part for the ecosystem. ‘Crocodilians are top-level predators. They keep other populations healthy by stopping them from overpopulating,’ said Hord.”
–Discovery reporter Julienne Gage reveals her preference for alligators and crocodiles over humans in an interesting article about how those animals present a greater danger to us than sharks. The article also raises the question of whether it would be better to be eaten by an alligator or crushed by a falling vending machine, which, THAT WOULDN’T EVEN BE A PROBLEM IF THEY’D MAKE IT SO THE FUNNY BONES WRAPPERS WOULDN’T CATCH ON THOSE STUPID COILS!!!