Tar Balls in Key West! Where Rich People Live! *Clutches Pearls*

That’s right, last night they found 20 tar balls bobbing around in Key West and now they’re testing them to see if they’re from the Gulf Spill or if they’re just from the regular, ongoing polluting and spilling. The best part is now everyone is fighting about whether the oil will ooze on over to glamorous and expensive southern Florida-nooo, not Naples!-because so obviously NO ONE REALLY CARES about Alabama or Louisiana (um we learned that lesson before, am I right?) or the Florida panhandle because ONLY POOR PEOPLE LIVE THERE. Poor people and poor, sad, oily cormorants-cormorants on welfare probably. Lord! Anyway, you get the point.