Science Edges Closer To Making My Nefarious Schemes A Reality

Here I am in Union Square wearing my invisibility cloak

Screw your jetpacks or your flying cars, the promise I’ve most been waiting on The Future to deliver is the invisibility cloak. Unfortunately, much like diet bourbon or a remote control that turns everyone on TV naked, Science has not yet been able to turn this dream into a reality. The problem is apparently an issue with the stuff that makes up invisibility cloaks: “the physical fabrication limits of their metamaterials were too close to the wavelengths of visible light, and they could only bend waves on the red end of the electromagnetic spectrum.” But what’s this? Science has discovered something new?

[Researchers] found they were able to bend visible light by using a two-dimensional array of coaxial waveguides arranged in a hexagonal configuration. The waveguides were composed of two layers of silver sandwiching a gallium-phosphorus insulator; they could maintain a negative refractive index for light of wavelengths as short as 450–500 nanometers, corresponding to the color blue.

I don’t know what any of that means, but if I’m reading it right it means we are so much closer! Hurry up, Science, I want my invisibility cloak and I want it NOW. I have plans.