Science: Dudes Will Do Stupid Stuff For Hot Tail

Psychologists at the University of Queensland, in Brisbane, Australia studied the behavior of male skateboarders and made a rather stunning discovery: Men do stupid things in the presence of a pretty girl.

In tests, the team used both male and female observers to watch how the men performed their manoeuvres at a local park. Results revealed that they ‘took more risks when they were observed by an attractive female than when they were observed by a male. ‘This increased risk-taking led to more successes but also more crash landings in front of the female observer.’ Saliva tests confirmed they had ‘elevated testosterone levels’ while a good-looking woman was around.

Scientists suggest that men take more risks around an attractive woman because they hope that the woman will be impressed enough to let the man put his penis inside her vagina, at which point he will pump and grind and grab and pull and claw and sweat thrusting slowly and then quickly and then slowly again until an explosive climax fills the woman with the man’s seed, after which he will immediately pull up his pants and head back to the skatepark. And that is how babies are made. The end.