Your Horoscope for Today, Scorpios, Is Filthy

Yesterday was such a phenomenal shit-show that, this morning, I thought: maybe for the first time ever I’d better check my horoscope? (I was inspired by Maura Johnston, who checked hers this morning and… basically got a weather report?) Mine is way more exciting though! Oh, fellow Scorpios, are you ready for what Astrology.com has in store for you?