In Which The Worst Movies of 2009 Are Agreed Upon

It’s that time of year, when New York mag’s Vulture publishes the results of their survey of 43 film critics, so as to decide the worst movies of the year. Because I do something crazy with my life-refuse to see most movies that are obviously going to be terrible-only two of my picks for worst movie of the year made their most-worst list.

Naturally, more interesting than the final lineup are the individual critic’s responses. So worth a read. God bless you, Ann Hornaday, for putting down Public Enemies! Bless you, Michelle Orange, for putting down both Amelia and Invictus.

Since we’re here, and the Internet is infinitely large, here’s my own least favorite ten movies of 2009, in order, as sent to the nice kids at Vulture.

10 Food, Inc.: GARBAGE. Complete and total regurgitated garbage,
barely offset by the rare piece of good reporting.

9 G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra: I mean obvs, Jesus Christ, WHAT.

8 The Great Buck Howard: WTF WAS THIS? [NB: SORRY. It was charming in many respects but the strange biography-fiction aspect was a terrible idea. SORRY. ❤ U SO MUCH, COLIN.] 7 Inkheart: SNORES.

6 Jennifer’s Body: Sad. So close to being of interest.

5 Julie & Julia: I hated this movie so much. The worst part was that half of the movie (YOU KNOW WHICH HALF) was good. Ruined by the OTHER HALF.

4 Nine: SNORE. RIDICULOUS.

3 The Taking of Pelham 123: LESS THAN NOTHING HAPPENED.

2 Echelon Conspiracy: I cannot believe that I was so sick that I put
this on the pay-per-view. HORRID.

1 Spinning Into Butter: YOU CANNOT BELIEVE HOW BAD THIS IS.

The only good news is this means that Knowing, which was awesome, does not go down in the books as one of the worst movies of 2009! Yay! That movie was AWESOME.