You're Doing It Wrong: How Not To Get Your Literary Novel Published

SO DO NOT DO THIS

There is a three-part process to peddling a novel (a novel is a book that is not born from a Tumblr), according to Awl columnist Matthew Gallaway. Here is step two: “Write a ‘query letter’ in which you describe 1) your reason for writing a particular agent and 2) a summary of the book. The entire letter should not be more than 2.5 paragraphs; keep it polite and professional without any gimmicks. (E.g., do not include your photograph or even a ‘cock shot.’)” Oh. My bad!